Best Joke I never Came up with...

by ilikebirdsOG 2002 · Nov 21, 2003 · 208 views

This guy walks into a pub and half his head is a big orange. He says: 'I'll have a pint of lager, please.' And the barman says: 'Excuse me, I couldn't help noticing, but half your head appears to be a big orange.' And the boy goes: 'Yeah, had that for a while now.' So the barman says: 'How did that come about, if you don't mind me asking?' And the boy says: 'I was in this old junk shop when I found a lamp and when I gave it a rub this genie appeared. He offered me the standard three wishes, and I said: 'For my first wish, I'd like every woman I ever meet to fall madly in love with me.' So the genie waves his genie hands and suddenly there's women looking at me. Then the genie says: 'What will your second wish be?' I said: 'I'd like a wallet with 1million$'s in it, and I can never lose it, it can't be destroyed, and every time I spend any of the money, it'll be replenished.' And the genie says: 'Your wish is granted. Now, what will your third wish be?' So I said: 'For my third wish, I'd like half my head to be a big orange .'

Whats brown and sticky...

A Stick

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22 Comments

#6 hunkpapapOG 2003

Nov 25, 2003

yo what's up with stealing my stick joke?

#5 tulipOG 2003

Nov 21, 2003

all i need is a miracle, all i need is you, yes, yes?
so whats up

#4 ukrainiumOG 2002

Nov 21, 2003

a stick with sapp?

#3 ilikebirdsOG 2002

Nov 21, 2003

bump! hahah

#3.1 flomojopoanodeFounder

Nov 24, 2003

it's so weird that you said "bump". My old best friend and I used to count using only 2 things. Bump and Seven. Our normal numbering system went from "one two three...." to "bump, bump, bump, bump, bump, bump, seven, bump, bump....." Who in the world just randomly says "bump" (besides me, you, and my old best friend?! So weird.

#3.1.1 skaorsk8OG 2002

Nov 24, 2003

umm...people who want to bump their threads to the top....??

#3.1.1.1 iwz

Nov 24, 2003

bizzingo!

skaorsk8OG 2002

Nov 24, 2003

i am so smart!! well...that...or i'm very proficient in the use of message boards.

flomojopoanodeFounder

Nov 24, 2003

hmm, never thought of it that way, thanks guys. So I'm the only weirdo on ezabel who doesn't count with any numbers(other than "seven")? It's too bad. I'm part of a dying breed, I guess.

iwz

Nov 24, 2003

yeah.. there's only like feff of you guys left

flomojopoanodeFounder

Nov 24, 2003

shut up before I have to kick you in the heemph. (this is merely another example of a word that my friends made up and used...it's not exactly a body part, but I threaten to kick it anyway)

We also made up the color "growlsh"

tinserOG 2002

Nov 24, 2003

whenever i say goodbye to jahanna online i say haroo haroo instead...and that doesn't mean anything....so that kinda is the same

flomojopoanodeFounder tinser

Nov 24, 2003

hey, you're cool!

iwz tinser

Nov 24, 2003

make it haroom and you're awesome!

jay79OG 2001

Nov 26, 2003

oh my goodness. I haven't heard that word used in so long. I miss not seeing Brett all the time :(

#2 ilikebirdsOG 2002

Nov 21, 2003

Who said i couldn't do it.. was WRONG !

A bus full of ugly people die in a wreck. Standing in line in heaven, God decides to grant each one of them a wish after enduring a life of misery for being so unattractive. The first person says, "I want to be beautiful." God makes it happen. The second person says, "I want to be beautiful." God makes it happen. This continues all the way through the line, each person wishing to be made beautiful, when God notices ME at the end of the line, laughing. As each person wishes to be made beautiful, I'm in the back continuing to laugh harder and harder, until I'm laughing hysterically. When I get to the front of the line, God asks ME for my wish. I say, "Make 'em all ugly again."