Letters are written
by (never meaning to send)
Ever write a letter to someone that they will never read? I don't really do this, cuz it's weird and in some ways pathetic. BUT, I was thinking that if you say what you want to say to someone in your head and if you go over it again and again as a hypothetical situation, it's kinda the same as if you were to write a letter and just not mail it. Or in these modern days, compose a draft of an email and never hit the send button.
Like I said the whole concept is cowardly. "I don't have the guts to tell you how i feel or what i'm thinking, but i can write it out and get peace of mind." I understand the peace of mind part.
Do you ever wish you could just go back? Get on that plane? Go to that party? Not have traveled out to LI? Not stayed out so late in Jersey? Not gotten lost? Not said it? Said it? Spent the money? Told him/her? Ran? I mean in any aspect of life.
It is amazing how so many small events in our lives shape a large part of the rest of it and impact it. And then the rest is a couple major events.
Maybe it's a quarter life crisis. I love how people say to live life with no regrets. Ok, but how do you not make mistakes I will live to regret? I will tell you how. It has to do with something done 5 times a week. And I don't mean weekday lunch. The only way to really live life without regret is to move on immediately. But like any diet, easier said than done. You can move on without something to help you move past it.
And so here i am. Finally writing a journal. As rambling and vague and pointless as this one is, you should have read the other journals i wrote and erased. So that is why i'm here. Cuz i did what i thought to be lame. But i still think it is when i do it. Ironically, i'm not a 'tell the whole world' type of guy. But if i get asked i'll say it. WHATEVER it is. It's a flaw. I must stop here because when i am inspired to write i don't stop....
AI Summary
28 Comments
I've written letters and not sent them. Mostly bitter ones...like after someone close to me has been df'd and is complete denial and I have no chance of speaking to them, but sometimes I write a letter "to" someone in my journal while I'm thinking out something important like an apology.
I do this ALL the time. I wrote letters to both my parents when they got a divorce, and at a number of other times (more like, milestones) during my life.
There have also been people that weren't majorly important to me, but they have upset or hurt me in one way or another. But to get closure, of sorts, I write the letter, rip it up, and I'm done.
I've done this before and it's not always cowardly. Like if someone has hurt you, writing an unsent letter can be the Christian way to deal with it. Forgiveness can be something unseen and unheard which will not only give you peace of mind, but give them the chance to change on their own without the guilt and discouragement of you pointing it out. Because it's unseen and unheard, writing it down somewhere in a letter or a journal makes you feel like you're done with it.
That says it good. Sometimes I can ramble on and on. Sometimes I just stay in the corner and do nothing. I guess I have a comfort zone that I get in around certain people. With so many personalities it is hard for me to know what to expect every time I take action. Like how I think a few people on this are really funny or sweet but I don't know what to say to some of them.
i always write letters.....to myself....in my journal. thats my therapy to get everything off my mind then i can re-read and analyze to make my situation better.
I'm pretty outspoken but re-reading what i've written helps me to learn how to approach the subject, whether it be to a friend, family member or co-worker, etc.
i do it all the time bro. sometimes there's no other way to get stuff off your chest. i don't know if it helps or not though, it's funny i just read this today because I was going through the same thing yesterday.
I think most people do this actually... me... im pretty odd, i would write poetry. tons and TONS of poetry... Then, one day, i just felt like i was holding on to the past, i took ALL my letters, all my poetry and everything, i just burned it all. It was nice... but then again, like i said, im just weird.
very symbolic, but i could never bring myself to do that. i think keeping all that crap helps me to learn from my mistakes
yeah, well i never got rid of the emails. I look at those, and see the changes i made since then. Ha, im still stupid, but atleast ive learned from some of my mistakes...
Yeah let's just hope you keep learning.
i've written a letter once and then burned it. it helped for like 5 min and then i went back to hating him with a burning passion.
HAHAHAHA. Well that is exactly what I would expect from you Janine and if it happened any differently I would be worried. lol
that's what happens when you marry 18 year olds :)
ohhh SHOOT!!! wow....i fully expect janine to rip into you SOOO bad... wow
it wasn't andrew you fat old maid. :)
by the way, how are those little girls you met at the formal? you know the ones you lied about your age to and that think you are soooo funny. have they gone back to school yet?
hahah i have no idea. one of them invited us to her graduation party, and we called like 3 weeks beforehand and said "hi, we're in seldom worked territory right now, sorry, we won't be able to make your party" as if it was in 10 minutes.
lol ... i had forgotten about them ...
Heeeyyy stay away from my Lil Rachel!!!
how did you know who we were talking about??
let's take this off-line.
yes, there is already enough evidence for blackmail my friend... use your admin abilities for once in your life!
1- I remember her saying how funny you and nick were
2- She had her graduation party recently and said she invited you
uh..yeah.
WOOOOOOOT i'm a topic of conversation among 17 year olds ... cerrato BEAT THAT!
yo MY game is MAD crazy, yo!
thats mean!
one time someone sent me this really horrible letter. so i burned it. but then i dropped it into a plastic trash bin that was full of papers. then that caught on fire. yada yada yada. i'm never allowed near matches again.
lol!! sorry, i dont know if this was meant to be funny, i just liked the yada yada yada part
ahha thanks. i realizxe sometimes my stories are long so i'm gonna start using the yada yada in all of them now.
I think the best songs come from unsent letters or poems.....it's really all about what you felt at that moment. Even if your venting and you may not feel that way later, sometimes down the road you can read whatever you wrote and just relate or see how much you've grown from it.
Example: For some reason when I just need to think, I play (u2 with or without you)Depending on whats on my mind this song never has the same meaning.