> > > > Biblical Ways to Acquire a Wife
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > Find an attractive prisoner of war, bring her home, shave her
> > > > head, trim her nails, and give her new clothes. Then she's
> > > > yours. --
> > > > Deuterononmy (Deuteronomy 21:11-13)
> > > >
> > > > Find a prostitute and marry her. -- Hosea (Hosea 1:1-3)
> > > >
> > > > Find a man with seven daughters, and impress him by watering his
> > > > flock.
> > > > -- Moses (Exodus 2:16-21)
> > > >
> > > > Purchase a piece of property, and get a woman as part of the deal.
> > > > -- Boaz (Ruth 4:5-10)
> > > >
> > > > Go to a party and hide. When the women come out to dance, grab one
> > > > and carry her off to be your wife. -- Benjaminites (Judges
> > > > 21:19-25)
> > > >
> > > > Have God create a wife for you while you sleep. Note: this will
> > > > cost you a rib. -- Adam (Genesis 2:19-24)
> > > >
> > > > Agree to work seven years in exchange for a woman's hand in
> > > > marriage. Get tricked into marrying the wrong woman. Then work
> > > > another seven years
> > > > for the woman you wanted to marry in the first place. That's
> > > > right.
> > > > Fourteen years of toil for a woman. -- Jacob (Genesis
> > > > 29:15-30)
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > Even if no one is out there, just wander around a bit and you'll
> > > > definitely find someone. (It's all relative of course.) --
> > > > Cain (Genesis
> > > > 4:16-17)
> > > >
> > > > Become the emperor of a huge nation and hold a beauty contest. --
> > > > Xerxes or Ahasuerus (Esther 2:3-4)
> > > >
> > > > When you see someone you like, go home and tell your parents, "I
> > > > have seen a ...woman; now get her for me." If your parents
> > > > question your
> > > > decision, simply say, "Get her for me. She's the one for
> > > > me." -- Samson
> > > > (Judges 14:1-3)
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > Kill any husband and take HIS wife. (Prepare to lose four sons
> > > > though).
> > > > -- David (2 Samuel 11)
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > Wait for your brother to die. Take his widow. (It's not just a
> > > > good idea, it's the law). -- Onan and Boaz (Deuteronomy or
> > > > Leviticus, example
> > > > in Ruth)
> > > >
> > > > Don't be so picky. Make up for quality with quantity. -- Solomon
> > > > (1 Kings 11:1-3)
> > > >
> > > > A wife?...NOT!!! -- Paul (1 Corinthians 7:32-35)