I don't want to get into it, really... it just seems my life is a chain of missed oppurtunities and the result of not always thinking things through at times, which I am the one totally at fault...

It reminds me of an illustration that has been used... you have a down pillow that you rip open over a raging river... no matter what you do, you can't gather those feathers back after you let them go.

Yeah, things usually work out... but it's best not to open that pillow in the first place...