Brotherman, while I understand your point and how having children affected your life, I've personally seen many scenarios of families ripped apart-both parents and children leaving Jehovah. The parents weren't made stronger because of having children-it actually weakened them. It is pointless to advocate one choice or another because that's what it is-a personal choice. Having children is entirely up to each couple to decide. The reasons they make that decision are personal and none of anyone else's business.
You rock!
uh, forreste, i gotta disagree. i think that a lot of couples DON'T make that decision at all - they have "oops" babies. they don't decide anything, they only decide to uh, relate to one another.
Well, birth control-that's part of their decision, too. (99.9% effective) C'mon bro you're married I don't have to explain how that sort of relating works. Still, you've got a point, there are a lot of oops babies.
I don't know...my point was more that we can't make a generalization of the results on people from having children because it's different in every single case.
i hate when i make "oops" babies. d'oh!
is that when you crap your pants?
not YOU personally. that was a general "you". upon re-reading my comment, I realized it could be misconstrued.(sp)
I think everyone is misunderstanding me. I think many believe I'm saying you have to have kids to be strong. Well, I'm not.
very nice to see you making a poop joke in a serious debate forum, lol. i understood the joke you made and i can't say i'm proud, haha.
Then those parents were never strong in the first place or let their guard down. The bible refers to children as a gift. If people are looking at them as burdens then they miss the whole point. And it also shows they are not laying their burdens upon Jehovah. Parents are only going to be successful by keeping Jehovah in the family unit. I grew up in a dysfunctional family. I know what happens when the parents are not strong spiritually. And yes it is up to the couple. All I am saying is, if the couple is strong spiritually, it'd only be natural that they'd become stronger bringing up spiritually minded children. They are instant bible studies. And if we can be strengthened by having studies with worldly people, then the affect should be even more satisfying when it is with our own flesh and blood. So I fail to see how no one agrees with this. Jehovah gives strength beyond what is normal. When you all are ready to have kids, he will give you more strength if you put him first. I hope this thought was more organized.
all she's saying is it's not always a good idea to have kids.
I agree. I'm not advocating to go out and have them if you are not ready. I'm just saying once you do, it'll make you a stronger person than when you were kidless, if you do things the right way.
so.... okay.. let me get this straight
IF you're ready to have kids (how one knows this is beyond me), and IF you do things the right way (which there are what, 10000 variations) , THEN having kids is gonna make you stronger
it's still a crazy statement but it's better than saying people without kids are out of touch with reality and having kids makes you see things clearly
at least you put some "ifs" into the staetment now which make it a little bit more reasonable... sort of...
hey i know this really nice and strong spiritual woman who has no legs, i think i'm gonna go cut off my legs because obviously it'll make me really strong and open my eyes to reality
When you have to take care of another individual of course it opens up your perception of reality more. You have to be more self-sacrificing. You'll see when the time comes.
There's one variation in the truth. Raise them to know and love Jehovah. I'm not talking about parenting techniques as far as discipline goes. That'll be different with everyone.
ok
but please don't say "WHEN"
why does it have to be "WHEN"
When you have kids
to me having kids is about as desirable as having my legs amputated so I woudl hope that it is not a question of WHEN but IF
thank you
Ok Catwoman. Hahaha....
in all seriousness, arguing on this topic is pointless and I am ashamed that i have participated in it at all, but like i said it is a sore spot for me because I have been dealing with this my whole life, being told that something is WRONG with me because I have zero desire to give birth. I think there is plenty wrong with me but the fact that I don't want to have kids is NOT wrong and it does NOT make me less of a person. haha.
and by the way, when i was dating my husband I told him, that if he wants to have kids he should marry someone else, i did not hide my intentions, and i have not changed my mind, and he doesn't wanna have kids either, and he is a VERY strong and amazing person
And I salute you for your accomplishments and growth as a result of having kids. yay for you!!
Once again, I never said a person cannot be strong without kids. And you are definitely not strange for choosing to be childless. I'd stand there next to you and defend you amongst people like that. Having children is a heavy responsibility. It shows people how strong they really can be. But if the thought makes you afraid, then you are better off not taking that step. It shows you are responsible. Too many irresponsible people bring kids into the world.
ok, cool, we're cool yo
You obviously feel so strongly about this because your children have made you appreciate reality. Personally, I find it admirable to look at the example of people who have spiritual "children" that they've led to Jehovah - full time servants that have sacrificed pretty much everything they have to help people learn the truth. They see everyday the gross reality of what's happening in this world. It affects them so deeply that they are willing to forgo things they may really want (like having children) so they can have more time to give everyone the wake-up call they so desperately need.
It is up to each individual person to determine their devotion. Granted, children with parent(s) that are serving Jehovah have better circumstances to make that choice, but that doesn't mean they will. The same thing with the parents-if their children don't make that choice, they might weaken their attachment to Jehovah because of their relationship with their children or disappointment (or any other number of reasons). Your faith is an ongoing confidence that can be built up or torn down. For you personally, it's great that having children helped you strengthen that. Funky understood me, all I was trying to mention was that you can't make the generalization that having children will have a positive effect on someone's spirituality.
Man, you're being so judgmental. Why don't you just say that having kids helped you personally spiritually, and you're happy to have that blessing? That's a positive statement everyone will support you on.
How am I being judgemental? If your children make you fall away from the truth then you didn't keep Jehovah in the arrangement. The same goes with marriage. If Jehovah leaves the marriage, chances are it'll fail. If you think that is judgemental then I don't know what to tell you. By all the things I hear you say about your coworkers, you shouldn't be calling anyone judgemental.
Ok, super defensive man.
You and I need to fight. ;oP
you two are funny.
We sound like we are married. Haha
Diane would have you 100% whipped.
I would have traded her in for 2 AAA batteries to put in my TV remote. Hahahaha.....
LOL!!!
I just threw up.
Beat ya to it.
Dude, you said something which facetiously nauseated me. Even your would-be comebacks don't make sense.
Oh stop it. You don't even know me.
I love it.
And I don't bicker with my husband because he doesn't say unreasonable things.
haha, diesel
cuz he's whipped and knows not to say them
hahahaha jk
Cuz he'd get the stare of death otherwise. Hahaha....