Boys boys *ah hem* mostly brodudeman... ummmmmmm NO MORE HATORADE
Don't think because I'm a chick I don't get it.
I totally see the hate in your eyes (digitally speaking of course) the jealousy is simply eating away at the very fabric of who you want to be in this eZabelian world. You've set this unrealistic expectation for yourself to begin with so... to start the cleansing we must address the root of all your Lexdirected frustrations:

LEX ROCKS THE SOCKS OFF EZABEL

And exhale