unfortunately, for it to be any good, it'd have to be a digitally shot indie. perhaps centered around disenchanted french rich kids hanging out and waxing intellectual/philosophical. there'd have to be a love story, or even triangle, that forces the group to break up, leading them to abandon the secret party spot, which will later be found by the patrolling catacomb police. evidence could lead the cops to the young people, forcing them to happily reunite in the tense court setting. the return to the catacombs and resume their parties under the noses of the authorities. the end. i should freaking write this!

OTHERWISE we can expect a really cheesy, over the top "innocent teenaged american tourists get tortured and killed after stumbling upon a sinister french catacomb cult's ritual ceremony" movie from our awful, crappy, exploitive hollywood system.

i'm sure there's a legit french documentary and movie or two about the catacombs floating around.