you did this for the convention, didn't you?? well, let me say that women are not attracted to kid n' play. not since the 80s.
you know.. i can never notice when a girl gets her haircut.. unless she gets it cut to her neck like wat britney spears did
four inches is so huge for a girl. i had mine down to the bottom on my stomach and got it cut above my chest. it was 5 inches. and it seems like its the shortest thing in the world now.
it depends on how long you were talking to a person. if you only saw them for like 4 minutes and they didn't notice, that's excusable. but if it was longer than 10 and they didn't say anything. ...
yes and i do NOT recall a conversation of more than 4 minutes IN A LIT PLACE. malibu please tell her that it's ok i didn't notice.
okay wait a second you rode with us into the city and you couldn't see my short hair? you are SO not getting away with this mister!
**thinks to himeself "a woman with issues..this is new"**** i'm sorry...how can i explain i have no inner monologue??
a man with no inner monologue?? wow there's something you don't come across everyday
holy crap...ok...i am actually laughing...how about... "hi, my name is forreste, and I try to fatten up everyone i know!"
you so set that one up buddy! and what can i say if you don't want a ham or my biscotti that's your loss.
(this is going to be like 20,000 leagues to a girl fight) "hi, my name is forreste, and i like to drive 400 miles to see 10 seconds of a concert!"
"hi, my name is dan, and i like to make forreste late to a concert that's 400 miles away"
(yeah ok it was all your fault!) "hi, my name is forreste, and I need other people to install my speakers so i don't have to listen to AM radio"
"hi, my name is dan, and i like sclub7 so much that i stole the cd from forreste" (i'm not ashamed to say i like sclub7)
(shut up i'm sure i drove you somewhere!)
"hi my name is forreste and my parents are making me move to a place where directions consist of 'turn left at the big tree'!
Forreste: "but you will come visit, RIIIIIGHT???"
"suuure forreste. suuure."
"hi my name is dan and i already live in such a place
Dan: you're lost oh turn around and make a left yeah i gotta go"
(hahahah your one friend got lost for 2 hours trying to leave my house...charlotte? what a moron!)
"hi my name is forreste and my dad is a boy-hating trekkie!"
(i'm sorry do i know her)
"hi my name is dan and my father doesn't exist"
(he does exist he is just always busy being away on business trips and creating clear soap)
"hi my name is forreste and i send large amounts of cookies overseas to starving kids in England who are named oobster"
(hey i didn't do that...yet!)
"hi my name is dan i don't eat cheese"
(dude that's not my fault!)
"hi my name is forreste and i am incapable of making any food WITHOUT cheese!" (also...as a bonus..."hi, my name is forreste and my sister wishes she was avril levine")
(hahahaha she is SO anti avril! socks on the arm don't make you an avril and fyi biscotti doesn't have cheese-neither did that ham)
"hi my name is dan can i take you out for coffee at some point in time"
(hahahah it's not my fault that i'm too popular!)
"hi, my name is forreste and bowling is the only acceptable Jehovah's Witness activity that I know"
(oh right that's why)
"hi my name is dan and i refuse to go to the movies...when invited to do a non-movie activity i also decline the invitation"
(come on man how many times can one person bowl and still get a 17?)
"hi, my name is forreste, and i idolize abba and shakira"
(haha you would have fun if you came with us trust me)
"hi my name is dan and i idolize keanu reeves...DUDE"
(ROFL he is my hero, right after jeremy jenkins)
"hi, my name is forreste, are there any ezabel people here i can meet?"
(walks up to mike and katie..."hi! i'm forrestina! i'm a geek!")
(puhleasse it's so obvious that you idolize keanu)
"hi my name is dan this is my sister can you talk to her?"
(how can you tell i idolize keanu???? i want to know.)
"hi my name is forreste and i'm secretly in love with fake carl"
fake carl..i know you're on here now...sorry dude
(here's a thought--it's all the dude-ing you do)
"hi my name is dan and i'm secretly in love with a different girl every week (okay so maybe it's not such a secret)"
(hahah *GASP* who else knows!)
"hi, my name is forreste, and i'll be friends with anyone from brooklyn! (or is it queens)"
(newsflash: everyone knows)
"hi, my name is dan, and i'll be friends with anyone who has a hot female relative"
(p.s. they're from queens-all 5 of them)
(ick i hate people from queens! you know who they are too! and there is nothing wrong with being friends with ian just because he has a hot cousin!)
"hi, my name is forreste, and I sell knives on the highway. over the phone. Please buy a knife."
(shhh i dont work for cutco anymore!)
"hi, my name is dan, what's your work number so i can call and pretend to be a customer"
(yeah only because you were crappy at selling knives!)
"hi my name is forreste, and I tell everyone I live in the 'wood' so I can sound cooler, and more black. because, let's face it, no one likes italian people."
(no that's because door-to-door knives saleswomen are weird...besides what if i have to preach to the customer later: here have a butcher knive and a Watchtower)
"hi my name is Jose from Hackensack" (isn't that kid whack?!)
(YO DON'T BE TELLIN EVERYONE ABOUT JOSE FROM HACKENSACK!)
"hi, my name is forreste, and it's my goal to date every asian person i know"
whoa hey let's not go down the dating history road--i only dated ONE asian!
hahah you've only dated ONE asian so far!!
i missed this one! do you know something i don't about asians in my future?
OH MAN! I'm going to the nearest cutco for a job interview tomorrow. Is that a bad idea?
i'm going to say "yes". i walked out of an interview there because it was so ridiculous.
that makes me very sad..why is it ridiculous?
i turned into dan when he brought his cousin from florida up to a party(Thanks for hooking me up dude) tell her i said hi,that YODA said hi
you're dad is tyler durden? would that make you dan durden?
what? what are you talking about? i'm confused.
"hi my name is dan and im too stupid to realize movie references"