if a guy doesn't make the move all on his own...he doesn't want you bad enough anyway, and isn't worth the trouble
that's your opinion because you're CHICKEN!! too scared to take a chance, i bet
we can be. that much is true. and when we are: boy, is it a mess. it's funny how girls go around saying stuff like that and guys don't, for the most part. nowadays girls are raised to have whats thought to be a healthy measure of contempt for guys. s'strange. but, anyway, i do agree with you're slant on girls CHASING guys. not cool. HOWEVER participating in the initiation and early cultivation of a relationship is something they should be very involved in. i stand by that.
i agree. i think girls are really brought up to be automatically hating on boys... and we do for the most part take EVERY chance we get to prove our ideas right, such as every time a guy makes a little mistake its all "o that is such a typical guy thing to do! i hate boys blah blah blah" and we get all our girl friends to also hate on that male (haha i love that about us!) and yea just cuz i think girls shouldn't be chasing guys doesn't mean i don't fully believe that we have our own weight to pull once a relationship is started.. i'm all for equal shares of making a relationship work...
that's what i mean....i think it's good for the relationship to be mutual...but when a girl chases a guy who clearly doesn't like her...it only creates problems. I've seen it happen, and I don't think its good...its not even good when a guy chases a girl too much, but it happens less often and seems to be more accepted.
This is probably gonna come out wrong, but, here goes...I think there is something in men that they intuitively don't like to be chased. It might be environmental, as in, guys are raised to do the chasing. But regardless, I've seen girls use pretty mild tactics, like asking for a phone number, or calling a guy to go to a movie, and be labeled a hussy. And the inverse of that is that I think a lot of girls feel like if a guy isn't willing to take the initiative in a relationship, there probably isn't anything there. There are NO blanket rules, of course. But I think these situations must have arisen for a reason. Being a girl myself, I have no objections to showing I'm potentially interested, say dropping a guy a postcard when I'm out of town or seeking him out for conersation at a party. But I wouldn't "chase" a guy, like ask for a date, or worse, just tell him I'm interested, because I know that guys generally assume this role, and the fact that he isn't probably means something - that he isn't interested. I'm much more comfortable just making it clear that I'm available and enjoy his company.
i also agree that a girl can initiate something w/o "chasing". get on common ground w/ the guy (even if it means finding out a little something about him from a trusted friend) and if the conversation goes well invite him somewhere you both would like to go. you will be able to judge your situation fairly well from there. i'm a total master at this hahahaha. no seriously, it works :)