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Momma Said

T
by toxicgirlOG 2003
· Nov 12, 2003 · 337 views

I was thinking about all of the things parents tell their kids when they are little. Sometimes, the truth is tweaked a little just to get a kid to stop a disgusting habit. My Dad used to tell me that if I popped a blister, then it would get infected. The infection would lead to gangrene and ultimately amputation. That story once scared me so bad I cried. He also told me that a yellow jacket nest outside the back porch door was actually killer bees. I wouldn't use that door all summer long.

What wild tales did your parents tell you?

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58 Comments

forrestina #8 forrestinaOG 2002
skaorsk8 #8.1 skaorsk8OG 2002

the best line in that article - RE: pregnant women having sex - "talk to your doctor before getting busy."

rocksupastar #8.1.1 rocksupastarFounder

i think dan should be pushed one slot up on the perv list, hes BAD NEWS!

tinser #8.1.2 tinserOG 2002

vomit inducing comment number 2

beachbum #7 beachbumOG 2002

i like better what we used to tell our younger brothers. that we bought them at kmart and they really weren't part of the family. and when mike had chicken pox we told him it meant his nose was going to become a beak and he would slowly turn into a chicken. that one made him cry. oh man, power is great.

esprit15d #6 esprit15dOG 2003

the kids on the bus told me if you flipped your eyelids and then someone blew on them, they would stick like that.

flomojopoanode #5 flomojopoanodeFounder

I know this girl (on ezabel) who told us when she was really little, the following: "my daddy says, if you stick your finger up your nose, it makes you fart". Oh, it was so funny, and it became a family favorite quote for several years!

ilikebirds #4 ilikebirdsOG 2002

my mom said.. " if you dont stop nursing already you're gonna grow up to be a weirdo "

T
#4.1 toxicgirlOG 2003 offtopic

Ew, that's so gross. At work that topic managed to work it's way into our staff meeting. Someone's sister nursed till her kids were 4. I've also heard of ppl going till 6. Bleck.

forrestina #4.1.1 forrestinaOG 2002

my sister did that...one of the society's magazines said that breastfed children are smarter.

T
#4.1.1.1 toxicgirlOG 2003

yeah, i've heard that too...but does it say that its best to do it that old?? those kids have teeth yo.

thatdarngirl thatdarngirlOG 2002

Ah but it's also good birth control!

T
toxicgirlOG 2003

Yeah, I learned we learned about the hormones stimulated with nursing in my Anatomy class. I know its been proven to be beneficial. I just think 4 is old. But hey, if you don't mind, go for it.

thatdarngirl thatdarngirlOG 2002

Oh no 4 year's old is totally disgusting, I agree. We were watching a comedian once and he was talking about his son and how at first it didn't bother him (breast feeding) but after a few months it's like "hey..there's a dude there" and when he walked into the room it'd be all awkward and his son would be grinning at him.

T
toxicgirlOG 2003

Hahahaha...ew, that is so messed up.

ophelia opheliaOG 2003

hahahaha..just look @ where your mind is...(although your right...& it's free)

fivezero #4.1.1.2 fivezeroOG 2003

yeah, well...i was at a gathering recently and a sister with her baby sat in a chair kinda near me, threw a blanket over her chest and began nursing! not a big deal really. BUT THEN SHE STARTED TALKING TO ME! and it was a little hard to concentrate and..encunciate. i think i pulled it off well even if i felt a lil funny.

ilikebirds ilikebirdsOG 2002

i love when women do that. you have to say funny stuff like... " if he blows into one.. does the other get bigger? " (jt)

ophelia #4.1.2 opheliaOG 2003

haha, i'm like picturing a kid, and his mother, both standing up, w/him just suckin away...not a pleasant thought...in fact that's gross, this entire forum should be deleted...no, not just this thread, the entire forum

D
#4.1.3 dgiaimoOG 2003

IIRC, the Bible says Samuel was 5 when he was weaned.

tesoro #4.1.3.1 tesoroOG 2001

that doesnt just have to do w/ breast feeding though..that could be weaned off a bottle..of COWS milk. haha

yodasucka yodasuckaOG 2003

um.... correct me if i'm wrong.. but they didn't HAVE bottles back then...

tesoro tesoroOG 2001

i'm SURE they coulda rigged something up..what you should've mentioned is that they didnt have COWS back then....strictly camel milk.

yodasucka yodasuckaOG 2003

THEY DIDN'T HAVE COWS?!? then why do we have them today... now i'm all confuzled...

fivezero fivezeroOG 2003

Jahanna. They had cows. They sacrificed many a FATTENED BULL! many a CHOICE HEFFA! they existed then.

tesoro tesoroOG 2001

haha..obviously you dont get me and my sarcasm well enough yet..i'm hurt.

fivezero fivezeroOG 2003

dang. upon rereading. i understand better. BUT STILL!

fivezero fivezeroOG 2003

they used skins. and earthen ware vessels.

yodasucka yodasuckaOG 2003

i want u to prove it.. show me a scripture where they say they gave a baby a bottle.... what now sucka?

T
toxicgirlOG 2003

yeah anyhow..."ur mom!"

fivezero fivezeroOG 2003

yes. your mom, Mellow-D. you're mother. her. yeah. SUCKA!

tesoro #4.1.4 tesoroOG 2001

ew..yea..past like 2 years old is gross...we know this sister who breast fed her one daughter til she was 5...and the kid is like...BUTCH! i'm convinced thats why..she's like..this little iron butter ball. haha

fivezero #4.1.4.1 fivezeroOG 2003

IRON BUTTER BALL. Good night, folks.

tesoro tesoroOG 2001

dont mock me brian..i'll kill you.

fivezero fivezeroOG 2003

i'm NOT! i thought it was extremely funny! "goodnight, folks" just kinda means that having read that i can call it a day. know what i mean, jelly bean?

tesoro tesoroOG 2001

ahh okay..that is acceptable then. :)

jay79 #3 jay79OG 2001

Come on...all kids hear "If you don't stop making that face, your face will freeze like that forever"

yodasucka #3.1 yodasuckaOG 2003

yea and whats that crap with sitting too close to the TV?

fivezero #3.1.1 fivezeroOG 2003

i hated that. my mom said that i wouldn't be able to have kids!

C
#3.2 choco345OG 2003

Thats hysterical you said that, my parents always said that too me!

skaorsk8 #2 skaorsk8OG 2002

my mom told me if you never took a splinter out of your finger it would go into your bloodstream and pierce your heart and you would die.

The only way to get it out was with a firey hot needle, according to her.

jay79 #2.1 jay79OG 2001

hahahaa, that is true though...it can go to your heart.

skaorsk8 #2.1.1 skaorsk8OG 2002

dude....that's so not true

thefunkyfresh #2.2 thefunkyfreshFounder

somebody told me something like that when i was little, they said that if you got a needle or pin or spinter or something stuck in you it could go into your bloodstream and hit your spine and kill you.

that reminds me of those kids in school that said if they hit you in the nose in an upwards motion your nose would go into your brain and kill you.

forrestina #2.3 forrestinaOG 2002

this reminds me of "those fruit rollups stick to the insides of your stomach"

flomojopoanode #2.3.1 flomojopoanodeFounder

I never heard that one before!

forrestina #2.3.1.1 forrestinaOG 2002

yea my mom was jealous that we didn't want to eat all natural fruit leather.

flomojopoanode flomojopoanodeFounder

lol, FRUIT LEATHER!

forrestina forrestinaOG 2002

well my parents WERE hippies. they used to grow/make everything we ate and wore for that matter lol.

yodasucka yodasuckaOG 2003

haha o man.. remember those HORRIBLE matching dresses mom always made fo rus for every assembly and convention... its no wonder we didn't have friends...

forrestina forrestinaOG 2002

hey you're just upset cus you didn't have ones made of terrycloth on the top. that kept me and sum soooo cool at yankee.

yodasucka yodasuckaOG 2003

LOL o man.. yea lemme tell u how i was jealous...

forrestina forrestinaOG 2002 yodasucka

that's it i'm posting a pic later!

T
toxicgirlOG 2003

My grandmother would make dresses for me and my sister. They were the same pattern, but Rebekah's was always a prettier fabric. I have no problem saying that I was jealous. Her memorial dresses were always better too. They came with cool hats.

beachbum #2.3.2 beachbumOG 2002

my mom always said if we swallowed our gum it would stick to our guts forever or if we swallowed pits or seeds a tree would grow in our stomach.

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#2.3.2.1 toxicgirlOG 2003

I watched the big urban myth show on MTV and they told me it was a lie. Thank goodness for the educational experience that is MTV.

malibu malibuOG 2001

hahahaha. i just picture you saying this so seriously and wiping your forehead like, "oh yes, thank goodness for that wonderful mtv"

rocksupastar #1 rocksupastarFounder

my mom told me about santa and the tooth fairy!!! and they really DO exist!

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