& just like that, I'm writing a book

Yeah so, I wrote a short story a while ago...Called "Void"...And, I just read it again, and, liked it so much, that it inspired me to expound upon it..I wrote it a while ago, & I can express myself a lot better now than I could then..So, I might end up enjoying the results of this effort more than that of the last..Whatever..Here's the first bit -

Void

“Um, well, no, no, this one’s going to be a bit more, um, long…winded…..” he said looking to the side, looking up, looking anywhere but within the vicinity of eye contact. The nervousness and awkward vibe in the air, juxtaposed up against the articulate, never at a loss for words style of expression everybody had come to expect from Rix(obviously not his birth name) fueled the notion that there might be some undisclosed matter at hand here. Although this out of the ordinary behavior did invoke a bit of weariness in the cosmonaut sitting across from the desk, it wasn’t enough for the stringy haired space traveler to start drawing any solid conclusions – not based on such ambiguous signals – maybe Rix just had something on his mind….Or maybe…His mind began to wonder, just as it always had since childhood…Oh, of course, all of our minds wander off a bit, we all have our mental tangents – but, Barry was different, his day dreams were so dramatic they almost offered the same amount of sensory stimulus that full color cinema would offer the “average” person….

Maybe…

Maybe there’s some top secret conspiracy going on under the surface – maybe, they finally found life on another planet, and, these life forms demanded that before any “foreign relations” were established between civilizations, a human specimen must be delivered to them, for study, just so they can see what they’re getting themselves into…

Or…

Maybe….

Maybe there’s some irritating dust particle stuck in one of his contacts…That’d explain why his eyes keep shooting back & forth…But, what’s with the constant shifting in his seat?...Hemorrhoids?....An internal giggle erupted…Maybe…

Or..Maybe

They're planning a surprise party for me, to commemerate my 10th year of being here - and, um, he's having a hard time keeping his composure - what with this secret he has to keep...

AAAAnnnd back to reality….slowly…almost there………

“…reaming again, he’s DAY DREAMING again. You can’t keep your mind focused for 2 seconds, how in God’s name did you become a part of the space program…Haha, so much responsibility…In the hands of a chronic daydreamer…This is ridiculous..” he heard coming from behind him…Some voices, upon recognition, evoke bliss, inner solace…This one evoked the exact opposites of each of those previously used nouns – not just in Barry, but, in just about everybody who this voice’s owner interacted with…Joseph was one of those people that brought out the worst in all – simply because he, was always at his worst – his human, understanding side, never to see the light of day. “Respond?..Nahh…sigh…He’s not even worth it…Not today”

This day dream, had taken quite a chunk of time…For its entire duration – Barry had been starring directly at the mission control supervisor – which kind of lead the guy into think that maybe, just maybe, attention was being paid..Funny how selective our senses can be – even sight. Barry WAS looking at him the entire time, but, his mind’s eye, and what it was firmly focused on, got in the way. “What did I miss?” Barry thought to himself. “Hopefully nothing important”…Deja vu…High school, calculus class, all over again. His boss' face started to mold into that of Mr. Bruno, and a never washed chalk board somehow appeared on the wall behind him. “STOP!!” he told himself. “Maybe something IS wrong with me….Or…maybe…Errr, STOP!!!…” By now, he was too embarrassed to admit that his childish habit had distracted him from what was right in front of his face, and so, instead of asking his superior to repeat what he had said, he simply nodded, and agreed. Agreed to what? “Good question…gooood question. sigh…this has become way to familiar of a feeling”…

“So?...Are you in?...Training starts in 1 1/2 weeks, it lasts 3 weeks…Mostly things you already know, a couple alterations and additions to your um, current knowledge, procedure and, um, protocol.”

“What kind of, additions? Just how, different, is this?”

“Well, for STARTERS, it’s a 2 year mission!...That, especially for you, that is a heck of a jump in time away from your life back here on the ol’mother sphere(One of Rix’s many idiosyncrasies was that whenever referring to earth, he would ALWAYS use some sort of clever phrase, in its place, instead of just saying “Earth”..it was funny at first, but, nobody really laughed anymore)Which is one of the reasons I was a bit, surprised, by your taking to it so quickly. I expected more of a speculative attitude, but, hey, this, I suppose this is more productive anyway now isn’t it?”

“Yeah, I suppose…Um, why exactly is it so long? Is it nothing more than just research? They’ve been using droids for that. Especially with the deep space missions..”

And instantly, he fealt trapped.

Although he had no idea what he was agreeing to when he had agreed to it, at the time - at least from what Rix had seen, he HAD agreed to it..Now - he'd have to go back on his "word". A word that he didn't even know he was giving, when he was giving it. "What's the big deal, I'll just say that, after further thought, I'm backing out...I've been BACKING OUT my entire life...What's another drop in the bucket.." he thought.

“Well as I had EXPLAINED a few moments ago, this is a lot more than research – that black hole that’s been in the news for so long, we’re attempting to get as close to it as possible, and well, by close, I mean within reason, you’re not FLYING THROUGH the thing. We can't use droids because –wait, one thing I really do NOT enjoy doing, is repeating myself..”

He flopped a file on the desk

“Take this home. Read it, thoroughly. Call me tomorrow.”