On Why Life Isn't Fun
by haha, first I really must say that I love the new disclaimer on top of this page... I can only think that it was Mr. Ukrainium that is the cause of this...
So I've been writing these journals, keeping all my fellow eZabelers updated on my various illnesses... and it is time for yet another update.
I woke up from my usual afternoon nap feeling a little off. So I layed in bed for a while and then realized that my ear was hurting a lot... this is abnormal because when does your ear hurt? I mean its an ear... I must say I never pay much attention to my ears, I don't notice them much, but since it was causeing me great pain I decided to pay more then the usual attention (wasn't that a talk not too long ago, I think I stole that from an assembly part or something). So any way, I'm laying there trying to figure out why my ear hurts when I realize that my head feels awful warm. Now this is abnormal too because my usualy body temperature is about 97 while normal people are usually at like 98 right? So I NEVER feel warm. So I get out of bed and get the thermometer and sure enough, my temp was 100...
So here I sit writing this journal... I'm not quite sure why I felt the need to, but for some reason I did- so here I am. I don't really know what to do for an ear infection, which is what I'm guessing I have.... The other strange thing is, I am still on meds from my last illness... so shouldn't those meds have fought off this infection making me NOT sick? I am not a happy child....
AI Summary
15 Comments
i've had ear infections before...you have to go to your doctor, and he'll give you an anti-biotic to take for like 5 days, and then it'll be gone. It might hurt a little, but it's definitely nothing major. It just happens because mucus gets caught in your ear.
well thats just disgusting... yea i'll go to the doctor tomorow...
you have 2 other options...
1) go to the health-food store and buy those amazing ear candle things. that should clean them out real good.
2) or take a flat head screw driver and JAM it in there! just JAM it in there! that may eliminate any pain you're feeling. It'll also eliminate any conscious thought for that matter, which may aleviate the problem.
hm.. no i don't do health-food stores.. but the screw-driver idea.. now that sounds like a plan, i'll be sure to get right on that one...
yeah your mom is some sort of medical person yet you and forreste seem terrified of natural remedies..that scares me. "sure, take some medication! that'll fix it!"
yo mel i get an idea light a cue tip on fire and look in a mirror and see if there is like an elf inside ur hear like digging for gold and finding ear wax and thinking its gold.
This is practical advice.
u have major problems babe....
this is such great advice!!!! ahahahaha :)
When I read option 2, blood just spontaneously started spurting from my ear due to the severe sympathy pains.
hahaha.... oh... YOU!
i think we get sick a lot because mom works in the hospital. oh and i dont go to the doctor. doctors just make me feel worse.
Are you one of those people that's never had an ear infection before? That's sooo odd. I get them twice a year, and I get swimmers ear every other week in the summer. You may be a little dizzy because it throws off your balance. You can keep your ear warm (it'll feel a little better) if you put a small piece of cotton or lambs wool in there (don't jam it in, that'll hurt)
alright...I don't just go giving this recipe out, it's a sacred Drummond concoction that's been passed down through the ages in my family, and is only to be used in EXTREME cases...This, has all the signs of an extreme case...and so, I bestow upon you, the Great Drummond Cure-All
OOOOOOK....
#1. Take FOUR cloves of garlic, a box of cheerios(no, not just the cheerios inside, the entire box, inner plastic bag & all), a shoe lace, 3 french fries, 2 quarts of melted ice(I know what you're thinking, why don't I just put water in, why freeze it & melt it again...just TRUST ME, OK!?!) & throw that all in a blender....blend for 10 minutes..and drink...(this next part is very important) you CANNOT blink while drinking..if you do, it will mess up the process, and you will have to start all over again
#2 Roll around in your backyard for 7 minutes chanting " I Love Bryan(jiga jiga jam jam) I Love Bryan(jiga jiga jam jam)" The origin of the "jiga jiga jam jam" part is a mystery, but still a vital part of this, it won'w work w/out it
#3 For 3 days straight, when you eat dinner w/your family, you must not eat at the table, but, under the table...
#4 Steal your parents debit card, withdraw $500, and give the money to me..and take full blame if you get caught, never mentioning my name(trust me, it's all part of the cure recipe, d'you wanna get better or not?!)
And that should do it!!!...You'll feel 110% better, BELIEVE me, it works...
i think just reading that cured me...