Control
by Not many things get me really angry. Im not a violent person. It really takes alot to push me over the edge. Today, in coming into work, I said hi to one of my female coworkers. First glance she was kinda slouched, covering her face. As she looked up to me, the light caught a scratches all around her eye, dark bruise going up and down the right side of her face, and marks on her neck. We took a walk down the cafe here to get some food, and she tells me what happened to her over the weekend. After the initial sentence of "well me and my boyfriend broke up and he wasnt too happy...." I couldnt help but have to try to relax my jaw and stop clenching my fists... The only things I could think of were tracking this guy down and throwing him the worst beating of his life.
As a Christian, we are trying to emulate Jesus example, to be peaceable among ALL men, including this low-life that doesnt even qualify as a man. I was raised, among with MOST normal men, that you never EVER touch, hit, smack, punch or lay your hands on a woman. Period. But seeing this... I think of what I would do if it was one of my friends that is a girl. I can't say I would be able to help it. Id grab a few guys with me, and make sure that this "man" wouldnt be able to do much of ANYTHING after we were done with him. I know this isnt christian in the least.
I really considered not having comments enabled on this, but I kinda want to know what others think of this, what should i say? I mean, im not close to this person, but regardless I still feel SOOOOO angry. And i have never been in a situation with a person i know and well... violence... i just... i dont really know how to handle it.
AI Summary
31 Comments
I've dealt with a lot of domestic violence cases at different law firms, and unfortunately, the only thing you can do is point her in the right direction. If she wants to press charges, you can give her the number of my old attorneys office in Hopatcong; they have free consultations and sometimes just talking about it makes women feel better. Or you could give her the number for DASI (www.dasi.org), a domestic abuse clinic for women in Newton. They have counselors that are free just so women can talk about how they're feeling.
Unless this woman realizes something bad happened to her, though, and it doesn't seem like she does, nothing you can say or do will make her feel like she's ok. Just try to point her in the right direction.
Also, use the Bible to offer comfort for her. Show her how Jehovah really wants earth to be, what he plans on doing about the problems we face, and show her that in the new world there would be no more wickedness. She needs consolation, and Jehovah provides the best kind.
Ugh, this world is so disgusting, I know what you mean, man. Especially if you know the person it happened to, you just want revenge. But I remind myself of the scripture where Jehovah says "vengence is mine". That's awesome to think about. But on the complete opposite side, this guy needs the truth. Then -if he truly learned to love Jehovah and other people, he'd never do something like that again, and he could be forgiven for his past sins. That's crazy to think about isn't it? Anyway, I've wrote a poem once when I was angry, maybe you felt a little like this:
as cool as throwing him a beating sounds, spending time in jail will mess him up a lot more in life then one day of hurt. Just point her to 9 11 as reno 911 cops would say :)
wow, that is so crazy! its awesome that you care....i hate hearing things like that too. i wanna beat the guy senseless too!
just be her friend and like todd stated, use the bible (isn't there an awake article that recently came out?) or as web-toed said direct her to that organization.
BUT if she doesn't take the help, and goes back to the guy (as some do) jsut know its SO awesome of you to care and you did your best as a friend.
...did your best as a friend and as a servant of Jehovah.
well, from personal experience, i can tell you one thing i DIDN'T like hearing "everything will be okay"
that's unbelievable. some guys are so cowardly its rediculous. when we were at the convention at a restaurant i saw a guy and a girl eating at a table and the girl had 2 black eyes. i wanted to take that guy out back, and that was just me jumping to a conclusion.
any "man" that does this should have one testicle cut off each time he does something like this.
what happens when he runs out of testicles? C'mon, you know it's bound to happen...
then you go for the knee caps....LOL *kidding*
actually, then he won't have a reason to go after women anymore so... problem solved. if though DOES happen again though... i say red hot poker up the pooper.
what should happen when its the other way around?
The February 8 1993 Awake "Will Domestic Abuse ever End?"
had some excellent points particularly in the section entitled:
An End to Domestic Violence. One thing the article mentions is being able to confide in someone (which she's done and should continue doing), and it also offers an encouraging thought from Ezekiel 34:28 "they will actually dwell insecurity and there will be no one making them tremble." Excellent Article
Nice job looking that up! Mike print this one out (if you want, I can email it to you at work)
S'definitely not cool. I've seen stuff like this happen and it certainly is infuriating. Some guys just have no honor.
Thanks for all the points, and i AM trying to talk to her... but its like.. im not THAT close to her, i dont know why she confided in me outta all the other people here. I really dont know what to say besides... "gimme his name and where he lives and he wont be a problem anymore"... im trying to be encouraging... but... i will def have to show her something from the bible if i can.
don't you think its jah's direction that she's talking to you out of everyone else???
Good point Gina. :)
Furthermore, I just had an experience similar to this, but with a complete stranger. The woman told me her fiance threw her out of a moving car (and she looked like it). I was able to show her some scriptural thoughts, and I placed a require brochure with her. She says she's interested in learning more. Who know's man, Jehovah's on your side, and he's using you to contact her. Say a prayer, ask for holy spirit, and guts, and make sure you prepare to share some scriptures with her. You can do it, I'll be praying for you, too.
yeah i know how you feel. We had a sister that was a friend of mine all while growing up and she had two separate incidents with guys that almost pushed me and my bro to the edge. One guy was stalking her really bad and another was just very wrong. But she told my sister and asked her not to tell us cuz she knew we might do something rash. So we had to respet that and she did everything along the proper channels..
atually i've had things along these lines with women i've liked and that is a lot tougher. By that i mean that sometimes they have experiences in their past with people not being nice to them. Especially if you have seen the person or know you will see them again. Doesn't matter if it's been a long time, it still makes you see red...
exactly... i mean... and i know every guy thats commented on this journal is pretty mild mannered... least it makes me feel better that im not alone in the fact that i wanna break both of his legs.
is she hot?
finally, someone's asking the important questions!
stupid and funny. whatta combo!
of course everything i say is stupid
i think its cleverly funny!
men who beat women.. should die.
women who sticks with man after getting beat.. needs brain surgery. he's not changing. move on.
To say a person could NEVER change is pretty harsh assumption...
Every sittuation differs,personalities and other factors differ.