Funny things i've said recently--FINALLY WITH SETUP!!!!

How stuffy can the lounge be if it has couches?
Well my grandmother has a couch...and her place is pretty stuffy.

You've got a girlfriend, so you're getting action now right?
Well I wouldn't call it action really, more like stop motion animation.

Me talking about crown for my teeth: "I'm saving up to pay for my crown"
Josh, talking about a crown for my head: "You're buying a crown?!"
How can I be king Patrick without a crown?

Guy telling random people about a party I threw at my girlfriends house
Oh yeah I was there too.

Did you show her the ring? You can give it to her as a small gift.
Right, because nothing says forever like the ring you got back from your ex fiancee.

after my friend MS went on about how crazy a girl was that he liked
Wait until he finds out what a picnic that is. But in the meantime lets not pretend like you dont still care.

I'm SOOOO Not telling you what this one is
Its a subject we both love to talk about. Not mine, just the subject in general.

We coreograph a mean Phill collins song.

after being reminded of all the details of a roadtrip to Pittsburgh
We backed up on the highway? I totally forgot about that part...

My friend was online with us at 7:30 then left for a talk and at 8:30 he signed on again
Dude, did you just give your talk and come back home?

after I said i was going to a place with josh directly then asked if she had to drive
How were you going to get there? Teleport?

after being asked for the fifth time in a span of twenty mintues if I had seen my brothers paper
I haven't found it. Still.

at 4 during work, when my boss forgot I had said I was leaving early, so instead of reminding her i just made it seem like i hated the day
I can't last until five.

My company has something called a hug letter and someone asked me what it was, so i made something up
We'll come to your house and give you a big hug.

what do you call two guys with no arms and no legs hanging in a window
Curt 'n' Rod.

On lockout after it was just me and the flag
I might have just fallen.

Ghandi, have some fiddle faddle.

Don't rent videos I don't know how long that market is going to last.

After my girlfriend asked why I had so much cash lying around
I love cash i can't get enough of it.

after I bought some from modells
I love ping pong. Can't get enough of it.

a friend protested that I had a toaster and had used it, even tho i was on the phone with them staring at my microwave
Only if you call the microwave a toaster.

They are old. Five years.

To a 13 year-old who wasn't supposed to play with his knife and then got it taken away after he used it to open a dvd
You should open it with your knife.

Me and Wiggy after we had gotten home from People killing Taco bell ten minutes away, each missing a burrito
We are going back and getting our burritos.

me to wiggy after I had stopped to get my car washed in the South Bronx and he wondered where we were
You're not afraid of the Bronx are you?

every time I go to one BK, they never have shakes even if they say they do
SO help me if the shake machine is broken i'm coming through the glass.