good point. not to discount it, but how are we to feel when it's someone younger than us saying this?? and then, scaring us into waiting even longer, a few months/years down the line they end up divorced or disfellowshipped. if the 'when are you getting married' comment is coming from someone with many years of happy marriage together or even an older, mature person-THEN it's a lot easier to accept those words.
When i was about 18 I was friends with this girl who was maybe 22 and single, and i remember certain people making comments like "OH MY GOODNESS why is she still single, what is wrong with her, she's gonna be an old maid" etc. etc.
annnnd things like that really stick with you especially when they are said by people in your family or others really close to you - and I remember being 22 or 23 and single and kinda hearing those comments in my head (and people constantly trying to "fix me up" with people i had no interest in.. geez) and kinda freaking out
also at age 22 i had just gotten out of a 3-year dating relationship.. and i wanted to be single for a while to really 'find myself' or whatever and it was annoying how people couldn't understand that i really didn't need a significant other every second of my life
i had plenty of time and nothing to worry about
I don't think i was secure enough to dismiss those kind of comments and I commend those of you who can dismiss them
I know someone who was literally emotionally RUINED by those kinda comments. Now she is exactly what everyone told her she was gonna be, NOT because she wanted to be that way, but because the comments and everyones dashed expectations have been ingrained in her mind and she can't get over it. This is one sad case, but it definitely happens. These comments effect how people live and go about life. Not me, but some people are HYPER sensetive to it.
i am really really happy for my friends that are happy single. and i'm really really happy for my friends that are happily married. it just makes me very sad when they are commenting on my situation cos i want to find my happiness either way. i haven't found it yet. putting pressure on me just doesn't help.
when i was 18, i went through two back to back relationships. both with guy friends that we mutually decided-hey we get along really well let's try taking this to a dating level. at 18, i definitely wasn't ready for a commitment so what was the heck was the reason i did that: a mix of my own stupid immaturity and pressure from peers. i could've continued getting to know either one or even both of those brothers on a friendship level. both of these relationships ended up hurting all 3 of us (we were all close friends before and aren't now) and our families as well. personally, i wasn't ready for something serious at that age. i'm not sure if i'm even ready for it now. i'm not sure if i'll ever be ready for it.
now if i like a brother, i keep it to myself. call it being guarded, not trusting or whatever you want. i call it "not jumping the gun." girls are viciously fighting over guys in desperate efforts to get in a relationship and get married. they leave a trail of broken friendships and relationships in their wake. it's not worth that to me. i want happiness for myself and my friends and everyone really. i know my time will come for happiness (in whatever capacity that is). if we all focused on our own spirituality and letting it affect our personality, we'd all get along better.
sorry i rambled...
even at my age girls still viciously fight over guys, its really sad and pathetic.
the thing i keep saying, find happiness within yourself. know who are and what you want and you'll be content either way.
=/ and here i was hoping things would get better as we all matured.