You Thought You Could Get Rid Of Me!
Sooner or later, everybody's past will come back to haunt them.....and now it's time for this deep, dark secret to surface. I, Dann Hill (yes, it's spelled w/2 N's, as opposed to just 1. which inherently makes it superior) for years have been the Hill's best kept secret. And now, I'm coming forth w/my story..GOING PUBLIC...Little do many people know, Dan was born a twin, but, I, being born with 2 extra toes, was shun by the familly and sold to a Nike sweat shop, to slave the rest of my life away making air jordans for a penny & a half an hour. And in order to cover up the deed, mention of my existance was never uttered. UNTIL NOW, I'm back, and with a vengance! muhahahaha...SLEEP WITH ONE EYE OPEN MR. HILL
AI Summary
73 Comments
So Dann...how old are you?
I'm exacly 17.4 seconds older than that fool Dan....THAT'S RIGHT DAN, I'M YOUR ELDER...
i beg of you to go away...one is enough
WHHOOOO this RULES! I have always wanted a twin!!! could it be jesse tamburi?? because he gets a lot of chicks.
(if it is jesse, i wish my milk allergy on him).
ah, so my efforts to infect you w/a lactose intolerance was successful!!!..this is just the FIRST plague you shall experience in my vengeful scheme...CURSE YOU BLASTED HILLS!!..YOU WILL PAY FOR YOUR DIRTY DEEDS!!
so you're dan's twin but not a hill
Why yes, I AM a Hill!!..But, it seems there are different moral levels to the Hill familly. Those who disregard children as if they were refuse, a dirty diaper to be thrown away into a trash bin. And those who beg, for nothing more, than acceptance......and pitty...and pitty $$, if you really feel for me
well you just sound gay
Im your best friend!!
I love you!
I love you man!!
ah, so this rejected twin phenomena is not unique to me..for it seems that yet another story has come to the fore front. I assume that you, rock exsuperstar, you too were born into rock superstar's family, yet banished and labled a freak due to an extra appendage?
Yes, Im actually the original, rock supastar is actually my clone. He was cloned from me 15 years ago, because people loved me sooo much they wanted another one of me around, yet they grew more attachted to the clone, and I was casted away...so I come back every now and then to say hello.
you said how they grew more attatched but i thought you were gonna say he grew to be a greater man than you and beat you down.
By greater man she means bigger.
exactly what i meant.
it's a good thing you have a translator.
Well, he is a greater man! He gets everything! The best job, the coolest cars, the best girl, the awesome apartment... and Im stuck with nothing.. NOTHING I TELL YA!!
come on... you still have typing abilities.
typing abilities doesnt mean anything! I want my life back... is that too much to ask?
apparently it is. we all love mike to much to give him up. you were just deciding to play god and make a clone.
I was not, he is my clone, and how did he get all the good stuff..huh?? Tell me that!
first is the worst, second is the best.
Thanks..Thanks A Lot!! Making me feel worse than I already am!
I FEEL YOUR PAIN....you have any idea what it's like to be stuck in a korean sneaker sweat shop, 200 degree warehouse w/ONE STINKING FAN, knowing that you're DNA duplicate is over seas sitting in his fancy air conditinoed living room watching cartoons, & eating cocoa puffs?!?!AHHH!!!!the agony
Yeah, and what about the fact that he already spent his life in other parts of the world, while you have been stuck here!
I remember while he was living in England, he mailed a letter to my sweat shop - I had never recieved a letter before, & didn't think anybody cared that I existed, so naturally, I was over joyed upon getting it - & then to find it was from my long lost brother, I was even happier. So I open it, gitty & cheerful, only to find a picture of him leaning up against a porshe, holding a CHEESEBURGER in one hand and wad of money in the other!! and he had this "Don't you wish you had this" look on his face...
hmmm, i think i am still a better typer than you...
Holy crap two dan hills. I can grub money of him twice as much!
holy crap. absolutely not. i am putting a stop to this right now. i can only save you out of so many situations involving you and other people's girlfriends.
What happend with other peoples girlfriends??
like i'm going to tell you, mr "i'm too good for the internet"
I have never said "Im too good for the internet" Stop putting words in my mouth!! Tell me!
You're ALL missing the point of this journal!..which is to feel sorry for me, and, take me into your home as the Hill family refused to - I need somebody to leach off - I mean, somebody to help me get back on my feet!...Your petty bickering is taking focus off of my perdicament!!.I comand you to stop!
DAN what in the world!
the only person who'd make this better is the person who owns the I hate birds name...
yea where the heck is my twin at.. i hate him
maybe it's the same person who is "tai"
i could beat both dan hills in a race if they didn't cheat
Who are you?
that's courtney clarke...you met her when you came to LI.
yep, i'm courtney...otherwise known as bombay
who art thou?
Im Giacomo... ever heard of me?
yep, i do remember meeting you now....and your part on the convention,...nicely done
listen, you're OLD AND SLOW! there was no cheating involved!
You cheated in a race?? surprise, surprise
listen AOL boy, i TRIED to let courtney win but she was just too slow!
AOL boy?? Who ARE you calling AOL Boy?? Huh?? Your the one obsessed!!
don't confuse me with you. in the words of justin from middletown..."be eaaaaaaaasy", my brother.
Justing from middletwon...who are you talking about??
never mind. never mind.
wait, now was this race on foot?..or we're talking about drag racing?...which by the way is ILLEGAL...except on my street...
no no, this was foot racing...like the kind they had in ancient greece....well, not exactly....b/c in greece they used to race for fertility purposes...it wasnt that kinda race...just a good ol' foot race....and dan had to corrupt it by cheating!!!!
hmmm......i smell a REMATCH brewing....i'll of course volunteer as refferee....my judgement is impartial, and the true winner WILL shine
okay, its so on....pick a date and im there
how did i cheat? just because i'm faster, better looking, and my parents allowed me to become ANYTHING I WANTED...
wow, hitting below the belt on that last one, aren't we? And, not only did you cheat, but now you deny it...that really makes you the evil twin...dann was right
FINALLY!!...my vilianous twin's true colors are starting to be exposed!...it's about time darnit
yeah, i cant believe i never saw it before...i say we all gang up on dan and send him to that third world country you were stuck in
yeah, deportation rocks...well, unless you're the deportee that is..BUT THE TABLES ARE TURNIN', I got friends in the Imigrations Dep.....& they're bribed easily....might have to pull some strings....IT'S CAMBODIA FOR YOU BUDDY
i don't think i have a clone, but i have a lot of look alikes around the country
hahaha yeah i caught your movie on vh1 the other day...
well hey if you ever decide that the look alikes just aren't enough and you think there should just simply be more of you in the world, I know a joint that'll clone ya for cheap....and i got coupons to so you're hooked up...the clones don't ALWAYS come come out as accurate as one would like (i.e. missing ears, aditional limbs)..but hey, the technology's getting better everyday
lol thanks, i'll keep that in mind
i loved this journal. i look at it, and it makes me smile. very funny!!!!
listen, don't encourage brian, all right??
but i like him. he's funny
why thank you malibu, as you might have been able to tell from my life story, appreciation is'nt something I come accross to often....just for you're info, I'm not only the funniest of the twins, but also the most handsome....being born 17.4 seconds earlier than Dan, I have a but more mature of a look to me