It wasn't like this in my day...
I am quite worried about the future of my country!
Following questions and answers were collated from last year's British GCSE exams(16 year olds)!
English
Q: Use the word judicious in a sentence to show you understand its meaning.
A: Hands that judicious can be soft as your face. (i think it may have only been on in britain but we had a fairy washing up liquid advert that went "Hands that do dishes are as soft as your face!)
Q: What does the word benign mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
Geography
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to
drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
Sociology
Q: What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
A: If you are buying a house, they will insist you are well endowed.
Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections?
A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election.
Biology
Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches Puberty?
A: He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.
Q: What is artificial insemination?
A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.
Q: What is the Fibula?
A: A small lie.
Q: What does varicose mean?
A: Nearby.
Q: Give the meaning of the term Caesarean Section.
A: The caesarean section is a district in Rome.
(side point - did you know it is called a Caesarean because Julius Caesar was the first child to be born via a C section?)
Q: What is a seizure?
A: A Roman emperor.
Q: What is a terminal illness?
A: When you are sick at the airport
AI Summary
35 Comments
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Did you mean filtration??
duuuuuuuh the whole point is that kids put down stupid things - ie yes in a perfect world it would have been filtration but the kid got mixed up!
Im actually kind of shocked about some of the things in this posting....
what happened to all the old comments?
Yeah, where did they go??
i was just thinkin the same thing
Man, great minds think a like ;)
i removed pre-approval comments upon approval. ; )
Does that take away from points??
yes, it does.
Aright I get your point!I'll stop doing it then!
ha ha thats all that matters to him ;)
No it isnt, Interesting and intellectual conversations, comments and stories also matter to me here on ezabel....
i do i do!
okay you know wahts frustrating? when white guys say "the bomb diggety"
No way "that is the bomb diggity"!!
ok.. don't tell me you all are really going through the source to read these comments.. .. thats so frustrating.. unless there's a way i don't know about .. read this :
hahahaha
how was GAY FLUFFY SHOES able to post pre approval comments..
WHO ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT??
i believe he was sent a link to the story.
i know how he did it ;)
SHHH!!
ha ha I know and Ian doesnt - i feel soooo clever ;)
Well thas cause you are ;)
Thanks
Anytime!
This proves english are dumb and the only good thing to come out of there is the hot chicks with the cool voices on sclub7. Thread over!
AMEN to that!!!!
hahahahahahahahahahahaha
THIS IS HYSTERICAL!!! I LOVE IT!
ha ha thanks you thank you ;)
and as for english being dumb
helllllllllllllllllllp
I dont get it...
mike enough said......YOUR AN IDIOT THEN!! (jk, only the jk that u say to make poeple feel better and dont really mean it. hahahah.)
very funny! where did you find this?