deutschlandboyOG 2003

Cameron Scherle was an 18-year-old from Bangor, Pennsylvania who joined eZabel in October 2003 and immediately began firing on all cylinders — journals, polls, comments, and an avalanche of messages to his friends ukrainium and bizarret that read like a stream-of-consciousness comedy special performed from a bathroom. His journal entries were the highlight: a bird attacked his face on the way to Mr. Z's market and left him covered in droppings (he blamed Calvin Klein aftershave), he accidentally mooned his mother while trying to prank his brother Derek, and at age 13 he introduced himself to a car dealer as "my father's son," which prompted the dealer to observe he looked more like his mother's daughter — sending him fleeing to the car for the rest of the summer. He also claimed to have written a novel about a guy named Neo whose life turned out to be fake, only to have "some guy" steal it and make a movie, a joke he delivered with such commitment that fivezero felt compelled to point out that Grant Morrison had already tried that angle and failed.

Cameron's crew was the Roseto/Bangor, PA circle — the Bazarte brothers (bizarret and his brother Dan), thatdarngirl, flomojopoanode, and yodasucka. He created three polls including the philosophical masterpiece "if you pushed your naked clone off a skyscraper would it be," started forum threads about Monday Night Football and Outkast, and once told punkprincess he was from the Roseto congregation and asked if she knew Todd, Toby Bazarte, Dan Bazarte, or Matt Opanowicz — basically using the eZabel messaging system as a community directory. ilikebirds wanted to know why there was "a picture of an 90% neked man" in his profile, and ophelia demanded he remove it immediately.

eZabel Personality Type: ENFP — "The Class Clown From Bangor." Cameron posted 25 comments in a concentrated burst between October 2003 and January 2004, and every one of them had the unfiltered, freewheeling energy of a teenager who had just discovered that the internet would let him say absolutely anything. His spelling was creative, his stories were vivid, and his commitment to the bit — whether it was fake German phrases, tracking devices in cheesesteaks, or yo mama jokes — was total.